Reading is Fundamental

 I was never much of a reader.  I wasn't.  I had no interest, so I struggled in elementary school because somethings REQUIRED reading.  Spelling for example.  I have a distinct memory of cheating on a 2nd grade spelling test with a book with the word violin in it because I could not for the life of me figure out  how to spell it . (SEE...that whole chicken...egg...argument in SO many different ways.  Yes, I was caught, no I didn't ever cheat on another test.

It wasn't until I was around 11 that my sister gave me my first Harlequin Romance.  OH YES I DID.  Now to be fair, it was what sparked my interest in reading, I didn't just head right down the road to smut (not then anyhow).  After I figured out that I could read something and enjoy it, I was able to go back and read some of the books I skipped over.  The Little House series.   The All of a Kind Family series .  I was still fairly particular as the topic had to spark my interest.  My sister did the Bobbsey Twins and Nancy Drew books, but I wasn't interested.

By 8th grade I had discovered such (chick-lit at that time) authors as Taylor Caldwell, Helen Van Slyke and yes Danielle Steele (WAY back in the day)  I was still reading the occasional Harlequin but I felt like I had grown as a reader (yeah...I can say that).  I remember in 9th grade, when the Thornbirds hit the shelves, staying up until 3am of the morning I had to go in and take a Geometry Regents (a NY state version of a final exam) exam just to finish it. I had also become a fan of Kathleen E Woodiwiss (whose prose tends to run a little purpley). I had come a long way.

My reading tastes expanded a bit over the years. But I struggle with two things: the classics and being told what to read.  This might harken to my high school days when I was forced to read the classics for English.  Freshman year was Red Badge of Courage (and I'm saddened to say I probably relied more on cliff notes).  Sophomore year was Ethan Frome.  I thank GOD Mrs Robinson read most of it in class because...no, just no.  And Junior and Senior year I have completely blanked out on what the required reading was.  But it was classic related.  Oddly enough, when I moved out on my own, I decided I needed to create my own library so I started purchasing the classic books (leather covers, gold foil lettering and page edging) from the Franklin Mint.  I have in my possession:  Moby Dick, Pride and Prejudice, David Copperfield, Vanity Fair, Huckleberry Finn, Candide, Plutarch- Selected Lives, Treasure Island...there may be a few more.  Wanna take a guess at which I've read?  Not one.  Maybe someday, when no one tells me I have to.

I moved through Dean Koontz and John Saul (creepy) books with regularity. Never a fan of Stephen King although I did read Thinner (he wrote it under a pseudonym).  I read all of the Harry Potter (have the first editions in hard cover..WOOT WOOT).  I read some Tom Clancy and Joel C Rosenberg. I became a huge fan of Vince Flynn but I haven't read anything by the writer who has taken over his Mitch Rapp series.  About 15 years ago I turned to Christian literature, having read all of the Left Behind series, and most of Karen Kingsbury.  I remember turning my oldest daughter onto Karen Kingsbury when she was a sophomore.  She read her voraciously that year and ended up with like a 1400 on her SAT reading scores. I made it through the first 3 of Diana Gabaldon Outlander series before I lost interest.  That could have been too much too fast.

And I have a problem with too much too fast of specific authors.  I discovered Jodi Picoult who I LOVED.  At first.  But her books do have a dark shadow in almost all of them and if you read them in succession that darkness tends to linger.  I had to break up reading them, choosing other authors in between,  and was fine.  Until I read Sing You Home.  She lost me there.  Never, in all my years of reading, did I flip to the back to see how  a book ended before that one and I did and threw it against the wall.  Not because I didn't know the ending, but because this time I did.  Her endings ALWAYS have a twist, which I rarely see coming in a book, until that book and she telegraphed how she would end it. There was definitely an agenda there.

Maybe 15 years ago, I made a hard left and started reading Historical Romance little knowing that in some cases it was soft porn.  Yeah.  I said it.  Bertrice Small was a favorite (and not I might add for the faint hearted).   And Stephanie Laurens. Both of them go through whole families and I liked that, eagerly awaiting the next book.  Other authors like Hannah Howell, had a couple different genres within the Historical Romance arena. She does mostly Highland romances but also adds a touch of paranormal into her books.  Linsay Sands is similar but dips into the occult. Lynn Kurland has 2 fun series, the Macleod and DiPaget, where she moves characters through time.  Karen Marie Moning also mixed Highlander Series (it must be the area) with some paranormal, THEN went straight up soft porn with her Fever Series (this was all about the fae, keep a fan handy).

My routine was to read at night in bed before turning out the light, or if I was sitting in the sun or bored.   Anyway, you get the picture.  A non reader turned reader.  Right up until the early days of the divorce when my ex told his girlfriend who relayed to her (now ex) husband who told me that I spent all of our marriage reading and he raised our kids pretty much on his own.  (just so you know, there is no way he could have had information regarding my reading...it had to come from somewhere).  At any rate, it was during that time that I literally stopped reading.  All together (yeah...I know the root cause). Oh here and there throughout the past 6 years I've managed to get through a new book (Kristen Hannah's Nightengale), but I haven't read with the same voracity as I used to.  I would have (actually I still do) have a stack of books on my nightstand to work my way through at night, but I have forgone that in favor of my phone or the TV (yes...I KNOW how bad that is).  As a result, I don't sleep well.  I spent the first 2 years on Trazodone, just to get a couple hours of sleep.  Then I tried melatonin which really didn't help.  Then exercise which calmed the body but not the brain.  It has only been in the last 2 years that I've been able to get some fairly decent sleep.  Ironically, in the heart of the city.  I could hear a train in my old house go through town 4 miles away, but in my 100 year old house, I hear only faint outside noise.

Last night I went to bed and I decided I was going to just read. No phone, no TV.  I picked up a new book I had and made it around 20 pages before the book started dropping...my tell that I am ready to turn out the light. I never even looked at what time it was.  Light off and I was out cold.  For a good 7 hours.  That just doesn't happen.  So I am now in experiment mode.  Will it work again tonight?  We'll see.  And if it doesn't, that doesn't mean I'm going to stop reading.  I've really missed it.